Give A Girl A Break...Sheesh!

Yes, there is a particular girl in this household who could use a break from life...no, it's not me. My poor little Madelyn has been through her fair share of ordeals in her short 8 years. You may remember that in April 2008 she had her last of 6 surgeries that had started the previous March. We were so excited to be done with it all (at least until her teen years, which is when they'll fix her jaw). Yeah, well...wishful thinking. This past Friday, we had to put her through one more, bringing the grand total to 11. It was a fairly easy one compared to some she's had. She had bladder reflux, which is where one of her kidney lobes was letting urine back up into her kidneys & causing infections. They were hoping she'd outgrow it, & with the absence of any infections for a while, we thought she had. After getting several infections in a few months time, we had her retested & sure enough, there it was...still there:( They have such cool techniques now days. Normally she would have been in the hospital overnight & she would have had more stitches to keep clean & put ointment on & change bandages, etc. Not to mention the cramping from having your bladder cut into...yikes. They were able to do it like they do scopes. They simply injected something called deflux into the tube & it lifts it & supports it & helps it correct itself. No incisions, no scars...a 30 minutes procedure & home the same day. Nice, right?! Once again...wishful thinking. The surgery did go well, once they got to her. It was supposed to be at 3:00, then it was pushed to 5:00, then to 6:00. By the time she went into surgery she had been 10 hours without food instead of 6, she was tired, worn down & simply sick to death of being in that same old waiting room. Fortunately, the surgery went great, she woke up really quickly, we got her home & all was well. And again...wishful thinking. After every one of her surgeries, her throat gets a little sore from the tube. It gets a little dry & scratchy for a few days, she coughs a little & then it goes away. So when this started happening on Sunday, we figured same old stuff. It slowly progressed through Tuesday, but was never anything out of the ordinary. Wednesday morning I checked her out of school because she couldn't stop coughing. From that point on, it just got worse & worse. The coughing was constant & became very wet, obviously breaking up mucus somewhere, she couldn't catch her breath at all. When James got home from work he told me he felt like she should get to the doctor soon. I knew he must be concerned & that "someone" was telling him something because it's usually me that is rushing off to the doctor & he's telling me to feel it out for a day & see if it turns into something. So...it's too late to make a long story short, so I'll wrap up the long story:) Madelyn & I spent the entire night last night at the doctors office & then at Timpanogos Hospital getting chest x-rays. The poor thing has Pneumonia. She had no air at all passing through her right lung. We're pretty sure the surgery is a major factor in her getting it. They say it's common for this to happen, especially to kids who have to wait all day with no food & their bodies just get worn out & then you irritate their windpipe & lungs...add two & two together & poof.

I can honestly tell you, I have never seen her so frightened in her life. I, myself was scared to death as well. I was trying my best to not let her see my fear. I knew that would only send her into panic mode, which surely would not help the breathing issue. Holding her in my arms, watching her gasp for every breath she took, was completly agonizing. She kept asking me if she was going to die. I told her that was not going to happen & if I thought it was a possibility, I'd be doing something right then to make sure it didn't. Try telling your child that, keeping your voice from shaking, while you hold back the tears that are trying to break lose because every worst fear is running through your mind. So horrible. Then add on top of that the fact that you have watched her go through so many things. Remembering every time she's had to put her fears aside & be brave. She's just been through so much and this one tops them all. My heart just breaks every time I think of what she's endured. So yes, I think she is in need of a very long break from things for a while. She deserves to just be a kid...fearless & carefree!! I really hope she gets it:)

She's been doing much better today. She's on a really strong antibiotic & I'm pretty sure the prayers from every member of each of our families has helped as well. I've always appreciated having such a big family (mine & James'), but it's times like this that make you feel so blessed to have so many supportive, wonderful people who care for you. She's not out of the woods yet, but she is improving. And I'll take that.